Salvation from Constipation

I've been having shitless days and nights lately. Yes, a terrible constipation. I realize one thing though, the longer my constipation goes, the more powerful my fart becomes. It's like the Hulk's rage, the angrier he is the stronger he becomes. When I say powerful, it is in terms of smell and area of effect (AoE). It's like my fart is being upgraded from atomic bomb to nuclear bomb.

To prevent the release of a nuclear bomb so innocents don't have to suffer, I'm holding myself back everytime I feel like farting. Trust me, that ain't easy. Sometimes when I can't control myself anymore, I wish I could equip a silencer onto my arse, so my fart would be soundless and undetectable saving myself from humiliation. However, even if I have a natural silent fart blessed by god, I couldn't escape from my fate when people around me started asking "hey, did you farted?"

I decided to write a poem to ease my soul:

I am no longer patient

because of my constipation

I wish I could free myself

from this fart-worrying self